Pairings: Jack/Ianto, John/Nick,
Characters: Jack, Ianto, John Hart, Nick Jones, and a cast of (probably!) thousands.
Spoilers: Set after Exit Wounds. Sequel to 'We Could Be Heroes'
Rating: Adult - it's going to get very dark in some places.
Warnings: Slash, language, angst, dark themes.
Summary: More honeymoon adventures!
Disclaimer: I'm not a student any more, but I don't own Torchwood.
The Master List is here: anduria-trianys.livejournal.com/27610.ht
Author's Note: Er...yeah. So, it's been a while since you've seen me and I'm so sorry for that. :( All I can say is that I completely lost my inspiration and my writing drive and real life wouldn't stop getting in the way! But I am back now and, I promise, I'm staying with this story to the (however bitter) end!
Also...I've no idea how many chapters this is actually going to turn out to be, so don't take the estimate of 27 as given. It may well change - heck, knowing me, it almost certainly will change!
John's Honeymoon Diary – Part Two
14th July 2013...
For the first time in I don't know how long, I was wide awake and fully dressed long before Nick even stirred. In fact, he was sprawled out underneath the covers and snoring like a steam train while I was getting dressed. I was almost surprised he didn't wake the dead with the racket he was making! I didn't even realise he snored in bed; he'd certainly never done it before, as far as I've noticed.
Hmm, I wonder if Ianto has ever snored as loudly as that? Or if he does now? That might be something to ask Jack about when we get home. Come to think of it, I could ask Ianto if Nick has always snored like that; it could be that I missed it all this time, because he's been so good at tiring me out that I just fell asleep.
Okay, now why am I sat here thinking about Nick's overly loud snoring? After the day we've had, this is so not the time to be thinking about whether Nick used to snore. And what a day it's been – although, I have to admit, I wouldn't have thought it would work out this well!
I had intended to take Nick to this fantastic wildlife reserve up in Verthaven Forest he'd been gushing about non-stop since he found out about it. It is a pretty amazing place, to be fair, but it's also the sort of place where you need to have warm and sunny weather to enjoy it. Unfortunately, I woke up late last night to the sound of torrential rain and when I checked the weather forecast (nifty little thing, these wrist straps!), I saw that it wasn't supposed to be stopping in any big hurry, and let me tell you, the weather forecast from these things is at least 99.9% accurate at all times.
So, obviously, I had to change my plans. Who in their right minds would want to walk through a forest in this sort of weather? Oh, wait, I forgot – my husband. My mud-loving, hill-hiking, rock-climbing Welsh husband.
Yep, Nick was less than happy to see that I'd changed our plans for today, and only marginally happier to see me dressed in biking leathers. He said that the only reason he liked them was because they clung nicely onto my butt. Which, I have to admit, they certainly do.
“Dirt bike racing?” he spluttered. “Seriously?”
“Why not?” I asked with a grin. “It's fun, it's fast, and, really, who else can say they did it on their honeymoon? Besides,” and I knelt down in front of him, “have you ever done it on the back of a bike surrounded by people watching?”
“I can't say I have,” answered Nick, running his tongue thoughtfully over his bottom lip. “But I also can't say that it sounds like a bad idea.”
“So, is that a yes?” I asked. “Because I know you wanted to go to that wildlife reserve.”
“I did,” insisted Nick. “I mean, I still do. But listening to what's going on out there, I'd have to say that I think you're right; this does definitely not seem like the weather for it.”
I chuckled. “I'd love to say that it sounds worse than it looks, but I would be lying,” I said ruefully, opening the curtains. “In fact, looking at that, I'd say that it looks a lot worse than it sounds.”
Nick got out of bed, winced and closed the curtains in disgust. “Ergh, this looks worse than it was yesterday! I know I'm Welsh and all that, but even I have limits to how much I can walk around in the rain.” He suddenly turned to me with a grin. “Biking, on the other hand...”
I grinned. “You want to race me there?”
“I hardly think that would be fair,” retorted Nick even as he groped around for something that vaguely passed as biking clothes (which proved to be thick dark blue jeans, a white top with a silver dragon design and his black leather jacket). “After all – you probably know where we're going a damn sight better than I do. You'd be waiting there while I got lost, no doubt!” He brushed his hair energetically and reached for an elastic to tie it back with until I slapped his hand away from it. “Hey, what was that for?”
“Leave your hair loose,” I said. “You look so gorgeous with it loose and you'll look even better with it flying behind you on the back of a bike.”
“And isn't that the truth?” teased Nick. “All right, my hair stays loose – assuming you can cope with the smell of mint shampoo up your nose!”
“Oh, trust me,” I said, catching his arm. “That is not going to be a problem.” Nick gaped at me. “I know how much I complain about your shampoo, but trust me, this time it's going to be worth it.”
Nick's shocked expression turned into a huge grin. “All right – bring it on!” Suddenly, he gave me a sharp glare. “But, I will tell you one thing; if we go home without going to that wildlife reserve –”
“Believe me, we are not going to be missing that,” I assured him. “But, even allowing for the fact that you're Welsh, this is definitely not the weather for it.”
Nick rolled his eyes. “And yet it is apparently perfect weather for dirt-bike racing,” he muttered, but he followed me anyway. I chuckled to myself at his words. He would see for himself pretty soon just how perfect the weather was for what we were going to do.
“You have no idea, Nicky,” I muttered to myself. “Absolutely no idea.”
We had to hire a small spacecraft to get us to Lal Bel Hidden Hill on Ethini Island – the galaxy-renouned haunt (to borrow Nick's term) of dirt-bike riding – rather than taking the usual water route, because the weather was so bad that we would probably have drowned before we got there. In fact, Nick actually wondered if we'd be able to do anything once we got there with this much rain.
“I mean, rain is one thing,” he said. “But this is just ridiculous – and I'm Welsh, for St. David's sake!”
“Don't worry,” I said, patting his leg. “This lot can do anything in any weather. Believe me, with how much rain this place could get, they've had a lot of practice. Besides,” and I ran my hand over his thigh, “if the worst does come to the worst, it's not as if we'll have nothing to do on the way back, is it?”
“That is very true,” said Nick with a positively lupine smile. “And those leather seats do look very comfortable indeed. So,” and he ran his tongue over his bottom lip, “if we don't get the chance to shag on the back of a bike, you can at least guarantee that I'll be having my wicked way with you on one of those chairs?”
I laughed. “Baby, I can guarantee that anyway. Whether or not we do manage to get on those bikes, you can bet your life that I will not be missing out on the opportunity to ravish you on one of those chairs!”
“Oh-ho!” Nick's eyes lit up. “You seem very confident about who's going to be ravishing who!” He glanced out of the window. “But I don't think we've got time for that right now.”
“Because we've just come in to land.” Nick grimaced as the ship landed on the runway, splattering mud all the way up the sides, and probably up onto the roof if the splashing sounds above us were anything to go by. He jumped up and made his way outside, me hot on his heels. “Sheesh. That'll take some cleaning up,” he remarked, pointing at the ship, which hadn't been especially clean before we left, but was now almost completely brown.
“And if I know these people, which I can safely say I do, they'll get this whole thing cleaned up faster than Ianto will,” I said. “Seriously, you want someone who's more obsessed with being clean than your cousin, look no further than here.”
“Here?!” spluttered Nick. “But it's a –”
“Dirt-bike racing track, yes, I know.” I couldn't help but chuckle at the shellshocked way Nick was staring at me; he really did look like a gaping fish at that moment – admittedly, an absolutely gorgeous gaping fish. “One of the great ironies of the universe, I suppose – some of the most anal-retentive people known to mankind work at a dirt-bike racing track. Still, I guess it is pretty amazing when you find something you're really not expecting, right, Nick?”
I didn't receive a response. “Nick?” I repeated and turned around to find that he wasn't there. I ran back to the ship, in case he had gone back to explore the cockpit. But only the pilot was there and she seemed surprised to see me back so soon, wondering if we had changed our minds and decided to go somewhere else instead.
“No, we're going to be staying here for a while today,” I assured her. “I just came in here to ask if you'd seen my husband. He seems to have run off.”
“Oh, the red-haired hottie, you mean?” she chuckled, tossing her hair back over her shoulder. “One of those shops over there,” she pointed to the entrance to the biking ground, “caught his eye and I'm guessing he went to check it out.”
I was about to ask which shop it was – some of them are pretty scary, even by my standards – when a pair of arms encircled my waist and soft lips started grazing and sucking on my neck. I smiled and turned around, gazing into a pair of familiar hazel eyes.
“Hi,” I said, framing his face and pulling him close so I could kiss him properly and let my fingers run over his face, neck and ears. “God, your skin is so soft, I could touch it for...” I trailed off when I felt something long, cold and hard attached to his right earlobe.
“John?” Nick looked at me, tilting his head. “You okay?”
“Yeah...Nick?” I traced my fingers over the long, golden thing in his ear. He gasped softly at the touch and I knew he knew what I'd found. “What's this?”
“Oh.” Nick chuckled. “I got a piercing. Well, actually, I got three piercings.”
“Three?” My voice came out in a squeak. I couldn't help it. “You got three piercings? In one ear?”
“Yeah.” Nick showed me the back of his ear where, sure enough, there were three spikes poking through. “You can't quite tell because it's just one earring, but there's three holes here; one in the dragon's head, one in his back and one in the tail. But I've got a bunch of single studs as well – and the odd little dangler as well...and you've got a really weird look on your face.” He frowned at me. “Don't you like it?”
“Oh, I like it. I like it a lot.” Whatever expression I had on my face quickly morphed into a grin. “But Ianto is going to kill you.”
“Ianto can think whatever the hell he wants. He's not my mother,” retorted Nick. Then his face scrunched up in disgust. “And that is a very disturbing thought.”
“Ew, yes.” I shuddered. “Please, don't put it in my head again. I really don't want to equate your cousin, whom I actually quite like, with that bitch whose only good act in the known universe was giving birth to you and your sister.” I stroked the dragon earring again. “I'm just saying, Ianto is going to freak when he sees it.”
“Even if he does, I don't care. It's my body, so it's my decision. Besides, I'm a doctor – does he really think I'd be thick enough not to check the place was sanitary first?”
I chuckled again. “Fair point. I see you not only got the common sense genes, you also got the adventurer genes when it comes to you two.”
“If by adventurer genes, you mean I'll try anything once, yes, I did,” said Nick. “But really, it's more a case of Ianto got the prude genes and I got the playboy genes.” At that point, he turned around and wiggled his butt slightly. “And aren't they very nice jeans too?”
I licked my lips sharply. “Yes, very nice. Now, let's get going, before I rip them off you and we never get on the bikes!” Without waiting for an answer – not that I expected to get one, really – I gathered him up in my arms and carried him up the hill, grinning as I felt the rain falling through my hair and dripping down the back of my neck.
“Oh, hell no.” Nick whipped round and glared at me. “You are definitely not carrying me.”
“Oh, really?” I asked. “What're you going to do, jump out of my arms and land face first in the mud?”
“That's exactly what I'm going to do,” said Nick, seconds before he...well, he jumped out of my arms and onto the ground. “Just minus the landing face first into the mud bit.” He shook his head. “What? You could say I've had a lot of experience getting around in bad weather. I mean, born and raised in Wales and went to university in Manchester. Not exactly places where you get gorgeous sunshine every day, you know.” Snorting, he tossed his dripping hair off his face and rushed over to one of the waiting bike handlers. “Let's go!”
“Fuck me, you're energetic,” I half-grumbled, but before I could say, or think, anything else, an almighty roar sounded in my ears and I nearly jumped out of my skin. “What the –“ Turning round, my eyes nearly popped out of my head when I saw my husband, his eyes alight with sure signs of a surge of excitement and his long hair flying behind him, come crashing through the mud on an enormous emerald green and silver bike. He actually took to the air for a few minutes and landed beside me, sending a blast of mud skyrocketing upwards and narrowly missing me by inches.
“Whew!” he laughed, grinning at me. “That was some ride!”
I smirked – I couldn't help it. “A better ride than the one I gave you last night?” I asked, leering at him. When we first got together, Nick would have blushed as red as his hair – especially if Ianto was around – and quickly found some job that needed doing or an excuse to make an urgent phone call.
But not now. This time, he tossed his hair off his face and leered right back at me. “I don't know,” he said. “I think maybe you'll have to give me another ride and then I can make a more informed decision.” His voice was casual, but his eyes were snapping and twinkling behind his glasses. And, damn, if that sight didn't mean I had to summon every ounce of willpower I had inside me to stop myself dragging him right back to our bed and showing him that I was a better ride than that bike! But I had brought him out here in the first place and, let's face it, it's kind of stupid to feel inferior to a motorbike, so I forced myself to straighten up and climb on behind him.
“You sure you know how to handle this thing?” I asked, wrapping my arms around his waist.
“I'm pretty sure I can pick it up along the way,” answered Nick. “Besides, it can't be any riskier than the self-installed hyperdrive you put on the plane that got us here.”
“Bite me,” I retorted, wrinkling my nose as strands of his hair flew in front of my face. “And for goodness sake, tie your hair back.”
“Why?” asked Nick. “It's so windy, it's going to blow everywhere anyway. Especially when I do this!” Without waiting for me to respond, he slammed his foot down on the pedal and almost took off through the air, dark mud shooting around us, almost forming a perfect archway. “Wow!” he shouted out, his voice echoing through the rain. “Listen to that engine roar!”
I had to admit, it was a pretty amazing sound and the vibrations shooting through me made it even better. Tightening my arms around his waist, I watched as he sent us flying through the air as if the bike had wings. It was intense, not to mention insanely exciting – so much better than the last time I'd come here, although considering how that particular date had ended, that wasn't really very surprising.
“We're coming to land!” shouted Nick, his voice whipping through the air. “Hold onto your stomach!”
“No need!” I shouted back. “My stomach is perfectly sturdy enough, thank you very much!”
“Oh, really?” scoffed Nick. “Well, we'll just see about that!” Casting his face briefly up towards the rain, he turned the bike into a nosedive so sharp I was amazed he didn't fall right over the front of it. “Here we go!” he cried out, waving crazily to anyone who happened to be watching – I wasn't paying that much attention at that point, to be honest – and hit the ground running, speeding down a steep hill towards one of the largest mud pools I think I'd ever seen at this place. The wheels crashed into the mess as he finally pulled the bike to a halt and then, quite calmly, jumped straight into the mud pool with a broad grin. “What?” he asked. “I told you, I got the adventurer genes.”
“You certainly did,” I admitted, jumping off the bike. “Jesus, Nick, that was the most fun I've had in ages, you thrillseeker!”
“Oh, it's not over yet!” chuckled Nick, pulling me down beside him. “I believe I still have yet to make my informed decision regarding who's the better ride; you or Draco over there.”
“Oh, so you have doubts about my capabilities, do you?” I asked, leering at him. “Well, well, well, we certainly can't have that, so, bring it on, baby!”
Next Time: The final part of the honeymoon adventures. Where will they go – and will the weather improve?